72nd Annual Golden Globes Fashion Review

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Awards Season started off with more of a whimper than a bang last night, with Fashion that either underwhelmed or confused at the 72nd Annual Golden Globes.  The show itself lost a bit of its edge simply by the mere fact that it was running over, and there was less of our beloved Tina & Amy, and more of the awkward not-very-witty banter between presenters.  Other than a skewering of Bill Cosby, there were very few of the surprises the Globes are known for. On the Red Carpet, it felt an awful lot like The Stylists are ruling the Roost, which translated to lots of predictable if lovely gowns, and experiments gone awry.  There were a few trends last night, some that can actually translate to Civilian garb, I will point them out as we go along.

More than a few ladies wore gowns that were either a slight high-low hem, or an inch or two above their ankle.  The gowns of Juliana Margulies and Kerry Washington, for example, fell between an otherwise elegant tea length and floor length.  Neither here nor there, I felt this trend was an attempt for Stylists to “shake things up” that fell flat.  As cameras panned down it was all, “ooooh, pretty — wait, what?”  Even Emma Stone, who wore a Lanvin jumpsuit, had her pants hemmed at this odd length.  I felt it worked better on her and with pant legs than with the dresses.  My trendslation on this look is, when it comes to length, commit!

Another trend on the Carpet was sheer illusion insets.  The way it was executed reminded me of Vera Wang in the 90s, her first real Bridal Collection, the Nancy Kerrigan stuff, that sort of look.  Claire Danes wore an incredibly interesting Valentino dress with illusion in the front.  It also had beads, feathers, and a gorgeous color palette of blues and greens and browns.  Too bad it was about 3 sizes too large for her from the waist up.  This dress would have slayed had it fit.  Kate Hudson’s gown, on the other hand, was tailored within an inch of her life also with sheer cut outs, illusion and sequins.  This dress was sexy.  Very very sexy.  But not all that elegant, perhaps touching on vulgar.  Cutouts in white were also employed by Emily Blunt in a goddessy Michael Kors, and Rosamund Pike in a Vera Wang dress that looked like it needed to be hoisted up onto her body about 3 more inches.

Other color trends last night were the ubiquitous ladies in red.  Allison Williams wore a beaded layered dress that I could only describe as an enormous Ruby Slipper.  Lena Dunham in a Zac Posen, again with the high low hem, and a very interesting low back.  I felt the front of the dress needed seaming or darting of some sort, but otherwise I liked the concept.  The aforementioned Juliana Margulies, and the ladies of a certain age — Allison Janney, Jane Fonda, Helen Mirren, all in fire engine RED for the evening.  they all looked fabulous, but none as incredible as 54-year-old Julianne Moore in silver Givenchy.  This dress was a work of art – high neck sequins that flowed into an ombre feather hem.  Her hair fell a bit flat for me, but what a stunner of a dress.  There are always a few girls in yellow, this year Naomi Watts and Jenna Dewan Tatum both did just fine in origami pleating and strapless canary.

Lots of “Party on Top, Formal Affair on the Bottom” type outfits with Kate Beckinsale, Emma Stone, and Jennifer Anniston in a dress that made her (finally!) look her age.  And not in a good way.  The halter either caused her to slump or made her look slumped, the hair and makeup wasn’t fresh, the cummerbund waist and high high slit were trying too hard, I really didn’t care for this look.  Also disappointing was Keira Knightley in a peasant frock thing that swallowed her tiny frame whole.  Even stranger was the Bed Bath and Beyond shower curtain that Kristen Wiig wore.  I love her, I usually love her style, I don’t know what happened here, but I hate it when the funny, smart women look silly.  Poor Tina Fey, in some sort of beaded thing on the Carpet with umbrella-shaped bottom, and then onstage in another version of that same dress, only to end with an awful tux thing complete with fake open bow tie.  She seems to have abandoned her elegant, somewhat retro, classic gown strategy.  As much as I applaud people coming out of their fashion comfort zone, this just looked costumey.  Another funny lady I adore is Melissa McCarthy.  She told interviewers that she almost went to FIT, were it not for her acting career taking off, and let me say I think we’re all pleased she found success where she did.  She wore a dress of her own creation that had so much going on I can hardly describe it.  Tiers, bows, pink, ruffles, long mermaidy Dutch Paint Boy what on earth dress?

I loved Dakota Johnson and Reese Witherspoon in head to toe sequins, you really can’t go wrong with this look on the Carpet.  Robin Wright was covered up and somber, while Jessica Chastain was poured and pressed into her bronze Versace.  I hope they liked their own looks more than I did.  I thought Katherine Heigl was pretty in a fishtail Zac Posen, but it is the precise dress she won an Emmy in a few years back but in navy instead of white denim.

Jennifer Lopez has never looked better physically, and at 45 years old, it’s a wonder why she decided to hide all her hard work and swathe herself in yards and yards of beaded fabric, huge hair extensions, and an illusion modesty panel to hold it all together.  Lupita N’yongo wore a purple flowery Giambattista Valli confection that I can’t say I loved on its own, but I just find her so beautiful to look at.  The complete vision of her was just so pretty.

Julia Louis Dreyfuss looked uncomfortable in a white asymmetrical gown, and Sienna Miller’s white Miu Miu was a bit stiff for her with too much illusion, but I didn’t hate it.   Also asymmetrical were Amy Adams in a beautiful blueish purple dress that could have used a little shift in fit in the chest area, and also in  Miu Miu was Maggie Gyllenhal in the most perfect color I have ever seen.  The rosy pinky satin was spectacular on her, although the dress itself was a bit wrinkled, but that color!

I also loved Anna Kendrick in an ethereal if safe pale pink gown with tiny beaded flowers, by Monique L’huillier.  Representing the young’uns was the usually edgy Lorde.  She wore a pants suit with a crop top and long straight pony tail.  I love her  because she is so herself, but I found this to be boxy and mannish and again with the odd length-this time too long. I wanted to love Ruth Wilson in a stiff green gown with slit up the back of the dress, but she looked so physically uncomfortable I couldn’t get on board.  Felicity Jones was the perfect Dior girl in a teal, high-necked classic gown anyone could wear forever.

Accessories last night were feeling a bit old school.  Fewer statement necklaces and more huge chandelier earrings (Jennifer Anniston, Kate Beckinsale, J. Lo) Others wore no earrings or small studs.  Salma Hayek stunned in a white strapless ball gown, but as she spoke onstage I thought, hair flowers, belt, huge earrings.  One needed to go.

The men of the evening only had a few standouts — I will tell Adam Levine to groom his beard a bit — the unshaved neck ruined his look for me, and Alan Cummings in an all nude suit was weird but so is he.  So.  Right.  Kevin Hart wore a black suit with white piping that literally outlined his diminutive frame, and George Clooney was perfection in whatever it is he wore, who knows.  Who cares.  He loves his shiny new wife so much, I could just watch him forever.

Which leads me to my best dressed for the night, Mrs. Amal Clooney.  She wore  an assymetrical elegant Dior, black, with white elbow length gloves, “of her own”.  Of course they were her own.  You can’t marry George Clooney without having white elbow lengths gloves of your own.  Duh.

All Photo Credits: Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP

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