2011 Emmy Fashion Review

Many of you know that Fashion Reviewing of Award Shows is the genesis of this blog.  Having taken the summer off, it is very fitting that the Emmy’s would signal my return to writing about The Thing I Love Most Besides My Kids; Fashion.  Ironicallly, I find Award Shows to be in a bit of a Fashion Vacuum.  There isn’t a lot that the everyday intelligent, stylish woman can really DO with a parade of gowns, and thusly there is a lack of ‘relevance’ in watching. Although some might say these shows are aspirational, fantastical, and just plain pretty, it does seem more and more odd in light of recent world events.  Last night’s Emmy Awards were no exception.  So once again, I ask you to suspend your disbelief, or at least your “who wears that?” for a bit and join me in looking at shiny, pretty things.  We all need a little more pretty, after all.

In terms of actual trends on the Red Carpet that DID have something to do with current (Fall 2011), RED was king.  There were at least 6 or 7 major stars wearing the color of the carpet, most did so well.  One standout was Lea Michele from Glee, who wore a surprisingly simple Marchesa. It was a cowl-back, short-sleeved, strong-shouldered gown that fit her flawlessly.  The pleating detail on the shoulder grew on me as the evening wore on, if for no other reason that I got tired of EVERY starlet in the same strapless, sweetheart, mermaid style gown.  She is the absolute Queen of the Red Carpet Pose, and will never take a bad picture because of this.  It was a lot of shoulder, but her simple hair and accessories made it work.  There were a string of starlets in the aforementioned red, strapless, perfectly fine mermaid gowns, and equally upbiquitous as their garb were their resumes — I’m not sure if its hulu’s fault or what, but there were so many Vampire Show Youg’uns on the Red Carpet that I had never seen before, it hardly mattered who they were. Anyway, they were all wearing the same dress.  Standouts in red included Kerri Washington, who wore a bugle beaded gown that glittered and sparkled and fit her PERFECTLY, but turned to a sheer fringy mess from the knee down.  My two favorite reds were Sofia Vergara (more on her later) and Kate Winslet.  Simple, clean, elegant, sexy, lovely.  And I could listen to Sofia say, “Vera Wang” over and over and over again with a smile.

Jane Lynch hosted the Emmy’s this year and did Just Fine.  In terms of her fashion choices, for my money it appeared she wore the essentially the same dress four times.  Fitted on top, slight empire waistline, graceful a-line skirt.  Whether one had a pocket or one had a twist at the neckline hardly mattered.  Clearly she learned that this silhouette works on her substantial frame (she is six feet tall, after all), but I found it boring.  It may be cliche, but I would still like to see her have a YSL moment in a sexy well cut tuxedo look, sans blouse, with slicked back hair.  Just to mix it up.  If Anne Hathaway can do it, you can too, Jane!

There was lots of gold/nude/champagne in the Red Carpet, including Padma Lakshmi who wore an incredible Armani Prive liquid satin dress that fit her to a T.  The seam down the front seemed to twist a bit awkwardly as she moved, more a function of the bias cut than a poor fit.  Her own jewerly designs and PERFECT hair topped the look off.  Also in gold were Elizabeth Moss, Maria Bello, Heidi Klum, Cat Deeley, and Christina Hendricks.  I felt like Elizabeth Moss has to always check — “Do I look old in this or do I look like an 8 year old?”  The line with her is thin.  The dress would have been amazing on Helen Mirren (uh oh) and the hair made her look too Mad Men.  But it was a pretty gown.  Christina Hendricks, on the other hand, had that perfect Marylin Monroe touseled hair that helped her dress tremendously.  I loved that she didnt do an adorned sleeve — she usually does, and they usually look like 2 extra boobs — but I did notice she was POURED into this gown, and not in a good way.  Her shoe heel was WAY to low for the dress, making her legs (viewable via the “up to there” front slit of the dress) look squat.  Eyes, up!

Heidi, as well as Sarah Highland (Modern Family), were wearing Project Runway Season 4 winner Christian Siriano.  Mr. Siriano is known for his insane ruffling, which he lavished on Ms. Klum, and avoided on Ms. Highland.  Both were in the most beautiful “is it pink or is it nude or is it taupe” colors.  Bravo!  Julie Bowen was in Oscar de La Renta, with a down to there neckline and graphic black and gray beading.  I loved it, I love her, ‘nuf said.  Claire Danes wore a similarly beaded affair but with a clean strapless neckline.

One of my favorites of the night was Emmy winner Melissa McCarthy.  She wore a dress of her OWN design (she had it made) in purple, and I thought it looked fantastic on her.  A purple, long sleeve, low necklined dress with just the right wasitline and just the jewelry, she really did me proud.  I would have MAYBE had her do a contrast waist line in another color, but otherwise, I love a girl who knows her body and doesn’t use a stylist.  Also from Funny Girl World were Tina Fey (post baby) in a boring black short sleeve thing (this is your get out of jail free card….next time, you’re up Ms. Fey), and Amy Poehler in the most horrible blue shiny tight short sleeve crew neck dress I have ever seen.  “Go for Scuba”?   Bad fit, bad neckline, bad.  AND PLEASE darken your hair a little!  Kristin Wiig wore a low low low Zac Posen brown satin gown that I liked well enough.  Her hair was too casual and droopy, and her makeup too heavy.  Zooey Deschanel wore a Monique L’hullier pink strapless confection that was ill-fitting on top, and had a random red ribbon around the waist.  And if one more actress quips, “Yay it has pockets!!!” and demonstrates how pockets work on the Red Carpet I’m going to lose it.  Really?  You put your HANDS in them?  Astonishing.  Zooey’s hair was a travesty.  All piled up on her head she looked like she was channeling the late Amy Winehouse. Her beautiful eyes for which she is known were completely lost.

One of my most anticipated actresses, Gwyneth Paltrow wore a Pucci dress worthy of discussion.  While I LOVED the concept, I felt the execution was lacking.  It was sheer, embroidered, and intricate.  It fit her flawlessly, and was different than anything else on the Carpet last night.  I adored the low back and tie detail but felt when viewed from the front, the break in embroidery at the waist cut her in half and made her look short and wide.  Which is a feat in itself with the long and lean Ms. Paltrow.  The break at the waist also made her look like she was stepping off of a Bollywood set — it screamed ‘Sari’ when I dont think that’s what she was going for.  Also odd was Juliana Marguiles.  She word an Armani Prive white silk ottoman (read: THICK fabric) column with a stiff (as in Kevlar) bodice adored with very large crystals.  It stood away from her chest in such a way that one wanted to pluck a crystal and toss it down like a carnival game.  It was uber modern while her hair was Rita Hayworth old world glamour.  This missed the mark for me completely.

I have to mention the boys, because there were actually some things to discuss last night.  Joel McHale had on the most bizarre shrunken white Good Humor Man jacket with a different color white shirt and what appeared to be capri pants.  Jon Hamm had crazy hair that flipped and flopped all over the place, it was distracting to say the least.  Seal can do no wrong in my eyes, especially when he wears no shirt.  He’s a little bit insane, but yum.  Chris Noth did it right with a white shirt and off white tie, and will always be Mr. Big to me.

I was disappointed in Minka Kelly, who wore a dowdy navy blue lace dress that did NOTHING for her figure.  She looked annoyed and as if the Charlies Angels set she walked off of is an ego fest waiting to implode.  She and her colleagues were struggling with how three women pose at the same time and all look great.  She looked cranky and it showed.  Paul Abdul is crazy as a loon, and wore an unknown designers black strapless dress with an overly blinged waistline and an asymmetrical neckline that looked like a mistake.  Diane Argon did a blue silk dress that was choking her, and aged her.

My best dressed of the evening was Sofia Vergara in Beera Wong.  (Vera Wang)  Ms. Vergara has worn red Vera before, last year it was a Wild West Saloon Girl affair, this year it was perfection.  The fit was perfect, she wore HUGE Colombian Emerald earrings that were in proportion to her, um, other body parts, and I actually liked that she took a break from the cleavage fest she usually enjoys and covered while hugging every curve.  Her hair, her makeup, her accent.  All delicious.


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